This, dear reader, is the 200th post for this little blog! When we started it last summer, I didn't know how interested I'd be in writing, or sharing things with the world at large about our lives. It turns out that structuring my thoughts, getting feedback and input, having my ass handed to me, some sympathy, and the occasional "Bravo!", has been a great experience.
One thing I've noticed is that I have stopped running from leadership/front positions. It's been something that has impacted me in the past. I've dropped out of groups, hidden in plain sight, and just plain refused to step up. No more! My skills don't run in the direction of being very organized, but I can help move this community forward, and whatever else I choose to be involved with, using what comes pretty naturally for me: talking, directing the action, and creating an active atmosphere that encourages discussion and sharing.
The local poly group we host has been doing very well in the past six months, allowing teaching and learning for many of us. It's also increased the attendance of the other poly group we participate in, as I've been able to refer many people there for more general poly concerns. When I started the group here, some feared that having more options would fracture the local community. It seems as though the inverse has been true, and I'm pleased with that.
In writing here, I've gained clarity on my own thoughts, patterns, found inspiration from your comments, enjoyed collaboration with my partners, and made some new friends. Some of the things I've brought forward have been very personal, in a way that exposed me. It's a little odd to look at dating someone, when they may have read so deeply into my soul beforehand. Why bother with a facade when I've already laid bare vast swaths of internal landscape? I think I'm more honest, with myself and with others.
So, as we all head off to dinner with PG's new lover and spouse, I am glad that S talked me into this last summer. It's been educational, and I look forward to lessons yet to be learned!